2073:
money can’t buy happiness but it can buy a false sense of security and fruity alcoholic beverages to numb the pain and honestly what’s the difference
If you think about it, the process of singing the birthday song and cutting the cake is extremely satanic
no but seriously imagine it this way
a small gathering of people huddle around a object on fire, chanting ritualistically a repetitive song in unison until the fire is blown out and a knife is stabbed into the object
you must be fun at parties
sounds like a party to me
(Source: fowlls)
Security camera clips that make the news usually show bad things, but Coke decided to “look at the world a little differently” in this heartwarming viral video. They found security camera footage from around the world showing happy moments: people stealing kisses instead of possessions, dealing potato chips instead of drugs, and offering car assistance rather than road rage. [x]
The friendship one tho.
It’s annoying when you are fucking fed up with someone’s shit but you don’t want to start something so you have to pretend like you don’t care
A Hilarious Blog that you’ll love!
- (I am working a morning shift at a cafe. We are serving breakfast. A little boy and his mother enter the cafe.)
- Me: “So, what will it be?”
- Child: “I WISH TO DEVOUR THE UNBORN.”
- (There is a sudden silence and everyone turns to look. The mother looks very embarrassed.)
- Mother: “Eggs… he would like some eggs…”
i hate when the teacher ends a lesson early and gives the class time to talk with each other because im always just sitting there alone for 10 minutes like
(Source: jesuschristvevo)
-insert witty blog title here-: c1rcasurvive: ghosteh13: voice-of-tartarus: demeaniac: what if with... →
what if with our first clot of air when we are born we inhale a soul, and every time we breathe out, we squeeze a tiny part of our souls out. would our final breath actually be the very last soul fragment leaving our…
its raining its pouring the old man is not snoring because hes dead
this comment speaks to my soul
poetry
So my parents just found out about my fourteen year old brother smoking weed because they found this on his window ledge. So in the middle of a huge lecture my dad decides to open the Baggie and smell it to see how strong it is. He immediately starts crying with laughter. THIS NIGGA HAS BEEN BUYING AND SMOKING FUCKING OREGANO. FUCKIN ITALIAN HERBS. SON. I CAN’T. I CANNOT. I CAN’T DO THIS.
This isn’t funny. That’s the gateway drug to a full blown marinara addiction. It’s good this was caught before this kid started hanging out at Olive Garden and sucking on every breadstick he can find to score another hit.
IT GOT BETTER.
